I have always been attracted to names. Names are important. They tell a lot about a person. I try to get peoples names right. It always irks me a little when someone gets my name wrong.
I have had a few names. No I am not in the Witness Protection Program. I just have had a varied life. I was born Cynthia Marie Bonham. A simple name. My immediate family has called me Cindy for as long as I can remember. My fourth grade teacher called be Bonnie. She never could remember my name. She always told me when I corrected her that I looked like a Bonnie. It should be noted that she is the only person that has ever thought that about me. Frankly, I think it was an alliteration Bonnie Bonham.
When I was confirmed in the Catholic Church I added my Confirmation Name. I wanted a male Saint. So I choose St. Thomas Aquinas. They insisted that I use the female version of Thomas which is Thomasina. Many thought that I wanted the name Thomasina because of the Disney movie about the cat, Thomasina. Not me, I am not partial to cats. Truth be told I had always wanted a name that could have a cool male nick name. You know, Lucinda could be Lou. Samantha could be Sam. But no I was Cindy. Listed in the Church Records I was, Cynthia Marie Thomasina Bonham. To my brother, Joe I was Cindy Boneywanna. To the my other siblings I was Nanny Goat!
When in High School I was in German Club and as part of taking German we all got to pick out names that would be used in class. I was Erika. I loved that name. I can't tell you why, I just did.
My next name came when I got married. I became Cynthia Marie Common or just Cindy Common. When people asked how to spell it I would say, "Common, as in ordinary." It didn't last long. When divorced I reverted to Cynthia M. Bonham.
Soon I fell in love or was it lust? My name changed yet again. I became Cynthia M. Lawson or just Cindy Lawson. Two children later that marriage had ended and once again I was Cynthia M Bonham.
Love reared it's head yet again and so did the name change. Now I was Cynthia M. Bonham-Paddock. Why did I decided to hyphenate my name. Well, it is complicated. I was working on my Master's Degree and I knew that I wanted to honor my parents and my last name. My father is an only child and our particular branch of the tree was looking a little light at the time. So I began the frustration of having a hyphenated name. Not only did I hyphenate my name I decided that I would claim Cynthia as my name. I had never liked that name. I wasn't named after anyone and it felt like an old name to me. But now I was a professional and felt I needed a grown-up name and Cynthia fit the bill. I came to love the name Cynthia. It was a name I had to grow into.
Once again my marriage ended, but fear not, I had barely changed my name back to Cynthia M Bonham when I changed the hyphenated part to Bonham-Miller. At this point in my life the only people that called me Cindy were my family. I was Cynthia M. Bonham-Miller with lots of initials behind my name. Then I decided to name my youngest after myself and have a Junior. Yes, I wanted to share the hyphenated name and to top it off, a female junior.
Life really got complicated. Cynthia, Jr came to me around age 6 or 7 and informed my that she did NOT like the name Cindy and she was going to be Cynthia and I would be Cindy! I was okay with that, I was going to go on a new life adventure and would no longer be working in my profession. So I became Cindy. But my official name, the name I sign on documents and who I am, Cynthia M. Bonham-Miller.
Cynthia M. Bonham-Miller, Sr try writing that on a check or filling out a form. It never fits in the little space/boxes. So here is the problem. No one gets my name right. It is especially difficult if Cynthia and I are together. For example, the dentist. They keep us straight by putting us in the computer as Cindy and Cynthia. The VA has me as Cynthia M. Miller. I do not know who she is, but I answer when they call me. The trouble is I am having trouble remembering which name each places uses for me. So when I call or check in it goes something like this, "It might be under Bonham-Miller or Bonham or Miller."
"Can you spell that, please?"
"B O N H A M - M I L L E R" Once the person on the other end actually said " no please spell your entire last name with the hyphen. I don't know how to spell hyphen."
It went like this, "B O N H A M H Y P H E N M I L L E R" Her reply was, "So how can I help you today." I almost burst out laughing.
I love my name I just wish it was easier for everyone else to get it right. I don't need a change of address card. I need a change your name card. My father tells me that in his address book my last name is in pencil!
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