Expectations...

I have been thinking about expectations a lot lately.  Not Great Expectations by Charles Dickens.  The expectations that others have for us and the ones that we have for ourselves.

What really got me thinking about this is the two children that sit behind me at Mass.  The young girl must be about 10 years old.   She has made her First Communion.  Her brother is younger, perhaps he is 6 or 7.  They are both old enough to know how to behave in church.  They do not behave.  I really am not upset with them.  I am upset with their parents for having such low expectations of their children's behavior.

I believe that people will meet our expectations of them.  If we set that bar low then they really do not have to work at it.  They can stumble along in mediocrity and be happy.  If we set the bar high and encourage them or better yet are an example to them, in most cases we will find that they will meet those high expectations.

I grew up in a home of expectations.

• My room would be clean and my bed made daily
• I would help clean the house
• I would be truthful
• I would set the table and wash dishes.   No automatic dishwasher in our house.
• I would say, "Yes madam and Yes Sir."
• I would respect my elders.
• I would sit still in church

The list could go on but you get the idea.  Now days it seems that we don't expect much of ourselves or those around us.  We have taken casual to a new high.  I am not suggesting that we go back to the days of women wearing gloves and heels.  I would, however, like to see us use our manners again.

Remember when "Please and Thank You" were magic words?  They still are, but many of us have forgotten that.  Remember when your handshake was a contract?  When we looked each other in the eye when we talked?

I am not saying that the Good Old Days were better.  They were different.  To my way of thinking, respect and politeness never go out of style.

Social Media is a curse and blessing.  It connects us to others that we might not ever meet, however, it also makes us more anonymous and thus we tend to not be as polite as we might be face-to-face.    We do NOT have to self disclose our every thought to everyone on the planet, twitter, or Facebook.  Somethings are and should be private.

Sometimes it is good to sit still, be silent and listen.  It is amazing what you can hear.

Do I Still Want Facebook in My Life

I have had mixed feelings about Facebook from day one.  Originally I was sucked in because a good friend invited me to see some photos.  Turns out that if I wanted to see the photos then I had to join Facebook.

It was very exciting in the beginning.  Sharing updates, photos, little bits of our lives and then it happened.  Facebook started to dominate my life.  High School buddies started to show up.  So did ex-husbands, their current wives and various children.

It is not that I am not happy to keep up with all these wonderful people, but really, I am finding that I am not really sharing anything with them.  Nothing that really matters to me.

I miss the days of looking in my inbox and finding a chatty email with a photo attached.  Now most of my emails are from companies or blog updates.  It seems that the more connected I am the more disconnected I feel.

I have been using Facebook less and less and am seriously thinking about dropping it all together.  I long for a phone call (I hate the phone), or a chatty email.  It still care, I just am tired of hitting the "like" button.