Monday, October 13, 2008

An Open Letter to My Brother


Dear Paul,
All the kids in our family were wanted by our parents.  We have all felt that way our entire lives.  You though Paul were and are special.  Paul you weren’t just wanted by Mom and Dad.  No, all of us wanted you.  By the time you were coming along we were at least old enough to know what was happening.  Your older brother, Joe, especially wanted you.  I guess that he was feeling a little out numbered by us two girls.
When you came home Joe put Oreo cookies and his favorite Tonka truck in your crib.   When Santa brought him the blue Air Force Jeep, you were the one that road in it all the time.
You were some handsome boy.  That blonde hair and blue eyes fringed with great black eyelashes that were and are the envy of most girls.  The door bell rang all the time with girls and boys who wanted you to come out and play.  You have a wicked sense of humor.  You always have.  How much did you charge the other boys to look into the neighbor’s yard and look at the topless sunbathing teen-age girls?
I brought you on my dates, because we all loved you so much and hey I did date guys with great cars and you have always been a sucker for a great car.  How many hours did you spend sitting in the driver’s seat in my car pretending to drive?
Now I don’t want you to think that you never did anything wrong.  You did.  I won’t go into detail though because that is not the point.
Here is the point Paul.  You are loved.  You are special and we all love you.  You are in a hard time.  Some really bad things have happened in the last couple of years to you.  Two accidents that you were not responsible for, yet you feel responsible.  You are doing all the right things to get over it.  We are all proud of you for that.  Even though you are doing all the right things it still feels like crap and you still aren’t you.
All we can do is support you in your healing.  So keep putting one foot in front of the other.   And even though you don’t feel real loveable right now we all think that you are and we all love you!
Love Nanny Goat
P.S.  I took the liberty of speaking for the family.  What else would you expect from your big sister?

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