Sure I haven't always been a practicing Catholic, but in time of trouble I find my rosary in my hand and Hail Marys falling from my lips. I grew up when Mass went from Latin to the vernacular. I missed so many things when we went to English Mass. Nuns in Habits, my big missal with all the colored ribbons, the tradition of Latin and the priest's back to you. It was all a mystery, but a mystery that I was part of...I grew to love the new Mass. I sang at the Guitar Mass, taught CCD and was happy with the changes.
I fell away from the Church. Now I am trying to come back. It is a struggle. It appears that there are more changes on the horizon for the Liturgy of the Mass. It has been 40 years and now they want to change some of the wording. Okay, I can learn new versions of prayers. It will take some time I am sure, but I know that I can do it.
Here is the fly in the ointment. I know in my heart that church is more than a building and more than the priest. It is suppose to be my relationship to God and how I live my life. So I move to a place where there is this new monstrosity of a church. It sits on a mesa and overlooks the entire town. It is so tall that they had to get a permission from the City Fathers to build above the approved height requirement. It has taken them 19 years to complete the church and they still have a shortfall of over $237,000. In my humble opinion they should not have built a church until they had all the money needed. It is fiscally irresponsible! I also believe that they didn't need this big a church. A smaller building would have served the Parish and they could have clothed and fed a lot of poor people with that money. But even the building itself is really not the issue.
The real issue is...the place feels cold. Not just the building, it is the priest and the people. I never have felt welcome. I never feel that I have been to Mass. The whole environment feels negative. For example, when the Choir Director comes down to help the congregation learn some of the new Responsorial Psalms, instead of introducing them with a positive outlook he says, " I have to teach you these new responses." How about this instead, "As you know the Church is changing some of the Liturgy and I am here to help you learn the new responses."
So I went across the river to Nevada and found a home. The priest met us at the door before Mass. All the people said good morning. It is a small well designed building but feels welcoming. Before Mass the commentator invited us to say Hello to the people around us. People are shaking hands, hugging, waving from across the way. Smiles and more smiles. They wanted us there and they wanted to be there. The sermon was uplifting and not condemning. When I walked out I felt that I had been to Mass.
1 comment:
I think I could have written part of this. I was and still am upset that the Mass went from Latin to English, I used to know the Mass frontwards and backwards in Latin and having been an Alter Boy I was very aware of what the Priest was doing. The church that I attended (St. Cecilias) had a beautiful walnut wood interior, stained glass windows, everything that you and I grew up with. The new Pastor (a number of years ago) painted all of the walnut white, replaced the stained glass windows and Lord knows what else has been done. I think about going back to the church but I'm not sure I could handle the changes, after all do you have to go to a building in order to believe?
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