Babies and Old Men

My daughter, Sarah, recently gave birth to a little girl.  As with all new mothers she has questions that she is a little hesitant to ask.  I remember those days.  You don't want to look like you don't know how to take care of this new little person that is depending on you for everything.

It has been my experience that babies and old men are very similar in their needs and views on life.  This is of course a generalization and may not apply to the baby or the old man in your life.

Crashed and burned

asleep on the sofa

1.   I am the most important person in the room, house, street, city, country, and world.  PAY ATTENTION TO ME!
2. I want to eat.  Not in 5 minutes.  Now if you please.
3. Both love breasts.
4. Naps are most important to the happiness of the entire household.  If the baby or old man is napping perhaps, you should be napping also.
5. I do NOT sleep well in my own bed.  Swaddling may help with the baby, but be careful swaddling an old man.
6. I sleep best in my recliner, sofa, bouncer, or your arms.  Sending or putting me in bed will only awaken me.  I may ask to be fed.

Samantha and Papa holding hands

Sarah has finally had one night when the new baby actually slept in her crib.  One night Sarah was so tired that she allowed the baby to sleep in her bed.  I warned her that this could start a bad habit.  I know I let an old man sleep in my bed one night and haven't been able to get him out yet!